Bits of Sweetness: On ditching the to-do list

On ditching the to-do list

I'm not an organized person by nature, but oh do I thrive on things being that way. If I happen to get our place somewhat organized, I hate for it to be messed up, simply because I know how much work it takes to get it back to its oh-so-pretty state. Today, while running around going crazy trying to get five things done at once, simultaneously getting annoyed at the 4-year-old for definitely not cooperating with those beautifully organized plans, I realized something- these times and moments of frustration are often because I end up putting the to-do list and the need for organization above my son (or husband)'s needs. Take the spilled yogurt container all over the floor for instance. I am so all over preventing annoyances from happening. This is an annoyance. It doesn't have to happen. It can be easily prevented by asking the parent for help. I wasted no time explaining this. He didn't say much, but the look in his eyes spoke volumes.  "I'm sorry Mama. I know I made a mess. But please, please don't be upset at me! Please just love me!" I was thinking about it later in the day, in the middle of one my less-than-flattering parenting moments. You know. The kind where the to-do list and whatever you are focused on is at the forefront of your mind and so-help-you, nothing is going to stop you from getting it done. One of those moments. I stopped myself in the middle of it, asking myself what the point really was. Ok... so you get those five things done on your list. And you get that clutter put away. Great. But is it really more important than Andrew's sweet sensitive spirit? What about the fact that he is a kid who is learning. I want him to learn patience. And to be sensitive to others. And have love and compassion and understanding. And... I am so totally failing at the teaching part there today... Sigh. To-do lists can be such a great thing, but I'm learning, they can't become more important than the people around you. I know my need for organization may very well be due to this pregnancy, but really, it's not an excuse. I want to make the most of these moments together. I'm coming to realize that, you know, I don't have to have a to-do list today. It's ok if we don't make it past A. Really. It's ok if that pile of laundry is still there. Those things are great, and having a home that is organized is as well, but not if it starts to get in the way of more important things like shaping and molding little people who will one day look back and remember things like the upset & disappointed  look on your face at them simply knocking over yogurt. (Ok, so maybe not, but if it happens enough, and is too common,they could.) Tomorrow- I'm ditching my to-do list. If I get to some of those things- fabulous! But if not, I need to remind myself that it is ok. After all, the days may seem long but the years are so short. I don't want to look back and feel accomplished at the things I checked off my list, but rather at the moments and love poured into our son. (and, into my husband too.) 

12 comments :

  1. Thank you! I try to stay focused on what's really important. I don't want to look back years from now & remember (or have Andrew remember) that I was stressing about the tiny little things rather than spending time with him!

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  2. Thank you! I try to stay focused on what's really important. I don't want to look back years from now & remember (or have Andrew remember) that I was stressing about the tiny little things rather than spending time with him!

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  3. Good plan!! I get so focused on what I want to get done but it's not the end of the world if it doesn't get accomplished today!

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  4. Good plan!! I get so focused on what I want to get done but it's not the end of the world if it doesn't get accomplished today!

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  5. That doesn't sound bad! it sounds like a good way to not go crazy ;-) Better way to manage the day!!

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  6. That doesn't sound bad! it sounds like a good way to not go crazy ;-) Better way to manage the day!!

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  7. I get the same way.  Especially when I'm focused on something it's crazy!  There will always be things to do.  I just have to remind myself if I don't get them done, than they will be there tomorrow.  I know, it sounds like a bad thing but it's really not ;o)  I hope I made sense.

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  8. I get the same way.  Especially when I'm focused on something it's crazy!  There will always be things to do.  I just have to remind myself if I don't get them done, than they will be there tomorrow.  I know, it sounds like a bad thing but it's really not ;o)  I hope I made sense.

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  9. I love having lists too but more as a guide! If it gets done it gets done but oh well if it doesn't. I like the flexibility of if something more fun comes up then we can do it and ditch the list. :)

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  10. I love having lists too but more as a guide! If it gets done it gets done but oh well if it doesn't. I like the flexibility of if something more fun comes up then we can do it and ditch the list. :)

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  11. This was a beautiful post with such meaning and wonderful reminders of what is truly important.  I agree with you 100% and think so much like you do. 

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  12. This was a beautiful post with such meaning and wonderful reminders of what is truly important.  I agree with you 100% and think so much like you do. 

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